|Romantic Tips For Him
his part in keeping the fire in the relationship
Even if she didn't, you should treat her like a queen and do the things I'm about to share. But whatever you do for her should
be done from a heart of much love and gratitude for the gift of your wife.
I'm going to break this down into many categories. This might be a good article for you or her to print out and go over
together to see where you can improve. Now you may be thinking, "I wish she would change though." Let me tell you, if you
begin doing the things I will share, she will respond in a way that is sure to wow you!! Let's get going!
THE CHASTITY DEVICE
Men, as your precious wife has locked you in your chastity device, out of love and respect for her you should wear it with great
pride and gratitude to her. It is a sign of commitment to her, of love to her, and your desire to be kept for her.
We have been asked if all of the chastity devices are "escape-proof". In a sense, there are no "escape-proof" chastity devices.
There is always a way out.
But we look at the male chastity device like a wedding band. Your wedding band can be taken off and you could commit acts
of unfaithfulness to your wife. That would be devastating to your marriage and to your soul.
The male chastity device can have wonderful romantic effects. With the wife being the Keyholder, she has a fun "sway" over
your sexual fulfillment. She can tease you, keep you locked or unlock you, whatever she pleases. She is in control! That is her
device, not yours. She has the key so she is the owner and only she has the right to take it off or to let your little "friend" out.
When your wife locks your device on you for the first time or after each time she so kindly lets you out for a bit, it is to be there
to stay. Just like with your wedding band, you should not even try to take the device off or to slide your little "friend" out.
Think of why it's there in the first place, and then leave it alone. Busy yourself with other things, get your mind off of pleasing
In short, like your wedding band, your chastity device says that the only one that is to be touching your penis is your wife, not
even yourself. When she is ready for it to come off, she will take it off and get you out. You are to leave yourself alone. Got
As I walk through the day and notice men, I am surprised at what I see sometimes. I see men who do not take care of
themselves and don't have a sense of pride (a good kind of pride) about their person. So here are some ideas:
1. Trim the excess hairs from your ears and nose, as well as facial hair that she finds un comely.
2. Take care of your breath. If you have problems with bad breath, brush your teeth regularly, use Scope mouth wash, keep
some mints around, etc. Don't speak to her with bad breath!
3. Do you have dry, rough skin? Use Vaseline Intensive Care Lotion, Nutragena, or another quality hand lotion. Don't go
cheap here. Some hand lotions are watered down and do nothing for the skin. Use it on your hands, feet, legs, etc.
Your wife would not like to be rubbed with sandpaper any more than with your rough hands.
4. Do you have problems with body odor? Use a quality antiperspirant, cologne, Odor-eaters for the feet, etc.
5. Do you bathe daily? Make sure to get the private areas real good. In fact, it is good to keep something like Johnson's
Baby Wipes with you to freshen up with after you use the rest room. Wiping doesn't get everything, but something like
these wipes are great to really be fresh and clean.
6. Look at your finger nails and toe nails. Most men don't give attention to them. Have your wife teach you how to
manicure yourself. Clean under the nails, push back cuticles, use an emery board to shape the nails, and purchase some
Nails for Males at a beauty supply store. It is a clear matte finish. Use on toes and fingers for a clean, fresh look.
7. There is a time to be grubby, and a time to be clean. When you are done with work and chores, get cleaned up and
appealing to your wife. Dress nicely, not like a slob.
8. Are you overweight? Out of respect for her and for your own health, begin exercising and eating good food. Stay away
from chips and beer and heavy foods laden with salts. Eat fruits, fish, white meat, etc. Drink juices instead of soda.
Begin exercising by walking, going to a gym, doing push-ups and sit-ups, etc. Set a goal to get down to a good weight
where you are trim and appealing for your wife.
9. Wear appealing underwear. You can find nice items on-line. A good place for guys is www.bodyaware.com.
There are so many things to share here.
1. Quit the foul language. Learn to speak like a human with proper words, not foul words, or taking God's name in vain.
Believe me, the wife does not want to hear that garbage.
2. Speak gently and politely to your wife and others. If you have a problem with anger, pray, ask your wife for help, find
out what is setting you off and have a plan to deal with it before it blind-sides you. Don't speak in harsh, commanding
tones in a way that demeans others and causes them to be alienated from you. Let your words be filled with kindness
and grace and love toward others.
3. Find at least 2 things to compliment your wife and others in your house every day. I don't mean just making things up,
but being sincere in your acknowledgement of something they did or who they are as a person.
4. Express your appreciation to your wife for her care for you, the meals she cooks, the little things that she does for you.
Learn to say "Thank you!" for these things. Also, when you ask for something, say, "May I please..." or "Would you
5. Do you help out around the house with washing the dishes, folding laundry, cleaning up after yourself, washing down
the sink and mirror after bathing, putting your dirty clothes in the laundry, etc.?
6. Look out for your wife's needs. Ask her what you can do for her that you aren't doing now. Tell her you really want
to please her and take care of her and be the best husband for her.
7. Do you open the door for your wife, pull out her chair to have her seated, make sure she is served food first, etc?
8. Do you do things that embarrass your wife like burping or passing gas without trying to be quiet? Ten year olds do those
things. They aren't funny. What about picking your nose in public? Use a hankerschief and blow the nose.
9. When you eat, eat slowly and with your mouth closed while you are chewing. Eating shouldn't be a race. Don't smack
the lips or after each drink of something say "Ahhhhh". Those things are very annoying!
10. When your wife is talking with you, give her your full attention. Turn off the TV or mute it, put down the paper, set the
tool down or whatever you are doing. Give her eye contact with a kind and accepting look while she shares something
Women naturally want the man to lead. Some men have assumed the position of a child or almost a baby. The wife has to be
the man and the woman of the house. That is not right. God made the man to lead, protect, provide, love, etc.
1. Is your life an example of virtue, honesty, love, truthfulness, faithfulness, kindness, patience, etc.?
2. Do you care about your wife's soul, how she is with God, taking her to a good church, opening and reading the Bible
3. Are you showing your children (where applicable) what it is to be a man? Do you train up your boys to be men of
honor and virtue? Do you show your girls how a man should treat a lady?
4. Are you frugal with the finances or do you draw your family into debt which causes stress and anxiety? Be a man that
is content to live within his means, putting away for a rainy day, helping others when possible, giving to the Lord's
work if you are a Christian, etc.
5. Learn to be a servant. First, be a servant at home. Help out with the kids and take care of things that your wife might
normally do. That will relieve her and give her some breathing room. Look around you and see if there is an elderly
person who needs help fixing things or cutting the grass or to be taken somewhere or their car to be worked on, etc.
Visit people in a nursing home or hospital. Fix food and take it to others in need. Give of yourself to others.
Lest you get the wrong idea, romance is not all about the physical sex act. Men and women certainly think differently on this.
When a man thinks of romance or intimacy, he often thinks of the physical act of intercourse and/or orgasms. When a
woman thinks of romance, she connects it to the full range of the relationship and all of the dynamics that exist there.
Men, get your focus off of yourself and back on her. When you only see your woman as an object of your sexual release, you
fail to recognize the depth of her personality, the beauty of her “person”, how wonderful and lovely the real “woman” is, and
therefore you are unable to enjoy the true romance and intimacy that could be had in your relationship.
You see, a man can have the physical act of sex regardless if he just had a fight with his woman. Whereas, the woman
normally need to be feeling good about the relationship before she is ready to give herself in an intimate fashion to the man.
The man is more interested in conquering and getting on with things. He got his fulfillment even if he left the woman feeling
somewhat humiliated and violated because he does not value her as a woman. He just sees her as a sexual fixture so to speak.
If he is in the bed with her for 30 minutes, the other 23-1/2 hours of the day he may speak harshly to her, not be helpful, not
care about her desires, dreams, hurts, what makes her fulfilled, etc. He may also be unfaithful in a variety of ways, including
masturbation, looking at porn, and illegitimate affairs. So basically, when he treats her this way she sees that he only wants
one little part of who she is but he does not care about the other 99% of her that really matters!
Men, you take care of the 99% portion, and you will have a woman on your hands that is the most desirable, beautiful, and
lovely person that you could imagine!!! She will love to be intimate and romantic with you. Her tendency will not be to give
you the cold shoulder.
Romance is all about valuing the woman, making her feel loved and secure in the relationship. It’s about her knowing that
you cherish and honor her. There’s no one else but her. She has no competition. When you speak of her to others it’s with
tender terms of affection.
Picture yourself being given a priceless vase. Your task is to carry it for the rest of your life and never harm it in any way. You
are to protect it even with your life! Its value is so high that nobody can place a high enough price on it. Men, your woman is
that vase. You are to treasure her as a priceless vessel and cherish her. Begin to look at her that way and then begin to treat her
that way. Watch what happens to your relationship. You will thank us many times over for this tidbit of advice!
So, how can you “romance” your woman, men? Let us try to offer some real practical ideas. These are not rocket science, just
simple, every day thoughtful acts that you can do for her that will let her know that you are serious about her and the
relationship. Men, these suggestions must come from a heart of love for your precious wife, not just "going through the
motions"! She is so worth it!!
• What does she enjoy for breakfast? Surprise her a couple of times a week with a wonderful wakeup call and a simple
breakfast in bed. Maybe it’s just a good cup of coffee and her favorite jam on toast. I bring my wife a cup of coffee while
she’s in bed every morning.
• How about right before going to bed you give her a tender back rub and tell her how much she means to you. Then
embrace her and go off to sleep without any other expectations
• Open the door for her, whether it’s the car or home or when you are out. When you go out to eat, seat her first by
pulling out the chair for her. Make sure she is comfortable first, before you sit down. Ask her for her order then order
• After dinner, clean off the table and do the dishes. Invite her to take a rest. Make sure you thanked her for the good
• Do you have children? Spend time with them playing and having fun. Play games, go on walks and bike rides. Spend
time talking with them and enjoying that relationship. Get on the floor and color, wrestle, make tents, etc.
• Make it a rule that you never, under any circumstances, speak unkindly to her, whether face to face or out in public to
others. Learn to control yourself if you have a temper. Speak kindly to her, with deep respect and admiration.
• Stop the porn and looking at other women!!! If you want to throw cold water on your relationship, keep those things
up. A woman feels violated and humiliated when she feels that your eyes and heart chase after other women… especially
those air-brushed babes in magazines that truly don’t even exist. She can’t compete with them, nor should she feel the
• What is her favorite dessert? If you can’t make it, go buy it and bring it home. Enjoy some quiet time in the evening
withthe dessert, coffee, and good conversation.
• Find out what are her dreams and desires. What would she like to see fulfilled in her life. Then, begin to take some steps
to make that happen.
• Ask your woman, “What would make you feel truly loved, cherished, and honored”. Tell her that you want to know
because you realize that you probably don’t do a real good job in these areas and want to improve.
• Help around the house. Don’t make her a slave to the washing machine, vacuum cleaner, stove, ironing board. Get on
your hands and knees and wash the floor, help out with other household chores.
• Buy some small scented candles and nice bubble bath. Send your woman an e-mail or call her and let her know that you
want her to free up an hour to take a nice hot bubble bath. Put the candles in the bathroom and light them. Draw the
water for her with bubble bath. Put on romantic music. Put some magazines in there for her to look at. While she is
soaking, find a task that you can do to lighten her load.
• When you are in public, hold her hand, put your arm around her. Show others that she is your woman and you are her
man. You are taken up with her and find her altogether lovely.
• Let her catch you staring at her, whether at home or in public. Eye her up and down and let her know how desirable she
is to you.
• Does she enjoy plays, operas, chick-flicks, etc.? Invite her to go out for the evening for a good meal and an event that she
• Quit taking up so much time with your sports, bar hopping, and continuous guy stuff. You don’t have to stop all of it
totally. But you are probably spending more time on yourself than on her.
• Be her best friend. Develop a totally open and honest relationship with her. Don’t do something in secret that you know
would hurt her or that would make her feel less than honored and loved by you if she were to find out.
• Remember how to ask forgiveness and admit when you have done wrong. Let her know you are truly sorry for
inappropriate actions or words.
• Does she have a particular hobby? Buy a subscription to a magazine that focuses on that hobby. Watch for seminars and
trade shows related to her area of interest and make time to take her.
• Listen to her when she casually mentions something that she really wants. Write it down. Try to find a way to get it for
her and surprise her for no particular reason.
• Learn to be a giver, not a taker. Find at least 3 things that you can do every day to show her how special she is to you.
Every day find several things to genuinely compliment her on. Don’t be fake, she will see right through that!
• Play a board game, card game or put together a puzzle with her. She will appreciate the time with you and some great
laughter and conversation will probably pop up.
• Buy her something intimate and special. Highlight her beauty in ways that is very honoring to her. Make her feel
beautiful and adored.
• Help her by offering to do her nails, brushing her hair, setting out some clothing or lingerie for her. These little items will
be very special for her. You will have a good time doing it!
• Does she like a particular type of candy or chocolate? When you are out, stop in a store and see if they have what she
likes. Put a red ribbon around it with a nice card or note letting her know that you are crazy about her.
• Offer to run errands for her. Give her some time to herself to relax and maybe do something that she has been wanting to
• Give good-bye and greeting kisses and embraces. You can carry those with you throughout the day.
• Send romantic e-mails. If you do it from work, be careful that you are not violating any workplace rules.
• Read to her. I don’t know a woman that does not like to hear her man’s voice when he is reading to her. It’s another
level of communication that she will love.
• Massage her feet. She will really enjoy the intimate attention.
• If you have children, take them out for the day and give her some time to herself.
• Bring home some fresh flowers, perfume, or her favorite bath oils or soaps.
• Buy scented candles or incense to create a wonderful mood.
• Put love notes where she will look; lingerie drawer, on bathroom mirror, on her dashboard, on her pillow, in her
April 2, 2011
"Romance Suggestion" in
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